Author Topic: Only Fools and Horses  (Read 3071 times)

Offline pete.r.

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Only Fools and Horses
« on: February 09, 2015, 12:56:38 PM »
                                                                                Only Fools and Horses
A story in four parts

PART 1

"Right" said the Colonel, "I've brought you all into the office this morning because I've an important announcement to make."
"'Ere" said Slugger, "Am I getting one of them new fangled smoke alarms for the kitchen?"
"Am I getting a loft conversion?" asked Steve.
"Am I getting a motorised wheelbarrow" said Ron.
"Am I getting new stables?" Dora enthusiastically shouted.
"Er......no," replied the Colonel. "Sadly not, they all cost too much."
"Blimey" said Slugger, "A smoke alarm's not that expensive."
"No" said the Colonel, "But all the batteries we'd need would cost a fortune. No, I've decided we've too many horses here at
Follyfoot. I've taken an advert out with National T.V. The idea is that people will watch it and then come to us to buy horses off
us. It's just a cheap advert."
"How does it go?" asked Steve. "Now, where's that bit of paper" said the Colonel. "Ah, here it is. The Jingle goes...."

"If you're looking for a horse,
And you find that you're stuck'
No need to roam, just pick up the phone,
And give us a ring here at Follyfoot."

There was a silence.
"Is that it?" asked Dora. "Well yes," replied the Colonel. "Then our phone number comes up on the screen."
"I take it this advert won't be coming on during Sunday Night At The London Palladium" said Slugger.
"No, it'll probably just come on Sunday night" exclaimed Ron, "When everyone's asleep in bed."
"See why you got it cheap" said Steve.
"Actually", replied the Colonel, "It was on t.v. yesterday and I've had several phone calls about it."
"What, people complaining" said Ron.
"No, some possible buyers are coming today to look at our horses. The first one's due any minute now" replied the Colonel
looking at his bit of paper. "Ah yes, it's a firm" he said. "Oh well, that sounds promising" enthused Dora.
"Steptoe and Son" replied the Colonel.
"Hey, they're here now" exclaimed Steve. They opened the door. A horse and cart was in the yard.
"'Ere, it's a rag and bone man" said Slugger.

"'Arold, 'Arold, shouted the old man, "Help me off the cart, me bleedin' legs gone dead."
"Pity the rest of your body didn't follow suit" said Harold.
"What did you say?" shouted the old man.
"I said no need to holler you old coot" replied Harold. "We're not deaf pater."
"Good morning" said the Colonel, "I'm Colonel Maddocks. "I believe you've come to look for a horse."
"I'm Albert Steptoe, where's the khazi? I'm dying for a" "Crap weather for the time of year" said Harold.
Albert went to the loo.
"So what exactly is the problem?" said the Colonel.
"He's too old to be out doing the rounds with the cart" replied Harold. "And he smells. It's putting people off doing business with us."
"Well I'm sure we can find a suitable horse for you" said the Colonel.
"Horse, horse, who's talking abut a horse" said Harold. "I'm talking about me dad. Well, if you'll excuse me for a moment I'll just
get the bucket and spade off the cart and go and clear his mess up off the floor."
"Oh, no need to do that" replied the Colonel," our toilet's got it's own flushing system" he said proudly.
"Oh it's not for me dad" said Harold, it's for our horse, Hercules. I always scrapes it up and takes it home with me" he said. "It
comes in very handy."
"For making manure? asked Dora.
"Yes, plus the fact it helps keep the flies off me dad" said Harold.

"Ah that's better" said Albert returning from the toilet. "I'm sure that ale we had at the Skinners Arms last night was off. 'Ere
'Arold" said Albert, "It's posh 'ere. They use The Times newspaper in the bog. They've done the crossword as well. Nice paper
though, you don't get the headlines imprinted on your" "Arsenic" shouted Harold.
"Pardon?" said Dora.
"Arsenic" replied Harold. "I should have put some in his tea this morning. You dirty little man" he said. You always show me up,
can't take you anywhere, you disgust me. I could have made something of my life, but no, I had to be a rag and bone man
like you. I could have been a thespian on the stage." Albert screwed his face up.
"Cobblers" he said. "Don't know what your mother would have thought. You'd have been a disappointment to her."

"Now look" said the Colonel, "What exactly is the problem?"
"Ee's useless" replied Albert, "Only fit for the knackers yard. Can't do a decent days work."
"I know that feeling" muttered Slugger, looking at Ron.
"Well I'm sure we've got a horse to suit you" said Dora.
"Horse, I'm not talking about a horse" said Albert, "There's nothing wrong with Hercules. I mean Harold."
"There you are, see what I mean" answered Harold, "Always pulling me down, never any encouragement."
"So you're both happy with your horse" said Steve.
"Yes", said Harold, "It was me dad who wanted to get another one. "No it wasn't" Albert retorted, "It was your idea. I don't want to get rid of anyone."
"Well I do" said Harold, "I want to get rid of you. I'm gonna bleedin' strangle you you dirty disgusting little man."

"Tea up" said Slugger, calmly bringing the pot in.
"Got any brandy" said the old man. "I'm sure we can put a spoonful in it" exclaimed the Colonel.
"Forget the tea, we'll just have the brandy" said Albert. Steve brought two glasses in. Albert knocked them both right back.
"Oh gawd" said Harold, cringing, "I do apologise. Sometimes my father can be so bleedin' embarrassing."
"Well must be off" said Albert, wiping his mouth on his sleeve. "The vicar's coming round for tea tonight.
"Oh gawd" said Harold, not another humiliating evening of filthy language, vulgar belching, lecherous jokes and rude scrabble games."
"No, it'll be alright" said Albert, "I've warned the vicar to behave himself this time. 'Ere that load of scrap metal in the yard" he
said, walking off, "We can take it off your hands and give you a goldfish for it."
"Hey, that's my bike" Ron exclaimed.
"Sounds like a fair swap" said Slugger.

"What a nice old man" said Dora as they rode out of the yard. "Well, replied Steve, just returning from the toilet, "let's hope the
cistern don't freeze up this winter."
"Whyever not?" asked Dora.
"'Cause that nice old man's just nicked all the lead piping on the overflow on it" said Steve.

To be continued.........










Cut out the strong to help the weak

Offline pete.r.

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Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #1 on: February 10, 2015, 04:11:51 PM »
PART 2

"Right" said the Colonel, "The next people are due anytime now. It's a Mr and Mrs Frank Spencer." The door opened and a head
with a beret on it popped round it, then he stood there in his trenchcoat and put his hand to his mouth.
"Mmmm....nice" he said.
"Oh come in" the Colonel said. "Mr Spencer?"
"I am he" he replied, "And this is my wife, Betty. He shut the door. The doorknob came off in his hand. "Oooh Betty" said Frank.
"Worry yourselves not, I'll get my toolbag later and mend it then.
"So you're looking for a horse?" asked the Colonel. "Mmmm," grinned Frank. "That picture of that horse on the wall's not level"
he said. "I'll just adjust it." Just as he was moving it he slipped and ripped the picture off the wall, the picture hook went
straight through the photo.
"Oh Frank" said Betty.
"My favourite picture" exclaimed the Colonel. "That's torn it" sniggered Ron.
"Ah, the picture hook's bent" replied Frank, "I'll put a nail in the wall instead." He fetched his toolbag and took a six inch nail from it.
"No Frank" said Betty. "Just hold that there" he said to Slugger. Slugger held the nail. Frank picked up a 7lb. lump hammer and
swung it towards the nail. Slugger ducked. He missed the nail and smashed a hole in the wall.
"Oh Frank" said Betty. "My wall" shrieked the Colonel. The old picture hook fell on the floor.
"Oh look it's still bent" said Frank, "I'll soon straighten it out." He put it on the table and swung his lump hammer towards it.
"No!" shouted the Colonel. The hammer smashed through the table and then flew across the room, every one dived out of the
way before it hit one of the chair legs.
"My table" said the Colonel
"My chair" said Slugger.
"My God" said Steve.
"Oooh Betty" said Frank. He grabbed his saw out of his bag and sawed six inches off the bottom of the chair leg.
"There, that's got rid of the damaged bit" he exclaimed.
"It looks more like a milking stool now" replied Ron. The chair stood for a second, wobbled, then fell over.
"I'll just saw the rest of the legs off to level it off" said Frank. "No!" shouted  a distraught Colonel.
"I know, I'll just fill the hole in the wall in then" answered Frank, "I've got some Polyfilla, it comes in very handy with most of the
jobs I do at home." He rolled some up into a ball and stuck it over the hole. "There, that's fixed it Betty" he said. "And I'll just
put the door knob on" he continued, hammering it in with his lump hammer.

"So you've come about a horse" said Dora. "Yes said Betty, for our daughter, Jessica." "How old is she?" asked Steve.
"Eight" replied Frank.
"Oh that's a perfect age to start riding" smiled the Colonel.
"Months"
"Eight months" said Slugger, "Blimey, that's a bit young innit?  Does she ride in the novices handicap then?"
"We don't want a proper horse" said Betty. "No" said Frank, "We want a rocking horse. One that doesn't do whoopsies."
"Oh I see" replied the Colonel. "'Fraid you've come to the wrong place. We don't sell rocking horses."
"Why don't you make one?" said Steve. "With your expertise in carpentry, I'm sure you could soon knock something up."
"Yes, and if you're stuck I'm sure Dora could give you some good woodworking tips" said Ron.
Dora frowned at Ron.
"And if you hurry you'll catch the builders merchants before they shut" said an almost relieved Colonel.
"We're on our way" said Frank, picking up his toolbag. The tools all fell out the end and the lump hammer landed on the Colonels
foot. "You clumsy great lump" he shouted, "And I don't mean the hammer."

"Well, nice to have met you all" said Frank. "We must away. I've had a lot of harrassment lately."  He tried to get out the door
but it wouldn't open, the hammered in knob wouldn't move. "Seems to have seized up" exclaimed Frank, "I'll get my screwdriver
out, I'll have to take the door off it's hinges."
"No" shouted the Colonel, "We may never get out of the room again. We could all starve to death."
"Yeah" replied Ron, "Especially as the only food we've got is Slugger's stew."
Steve took the screwdriver out of Frank's hands and took the doorknob off and opened the door. A grateful Colonel sighed with
relief.
"Depart we shall" said Frank. "Farewell."
And off they went.

The Colonel sat there surveying the room. The broken table, chair, picture, the lump of polyfilla sticking out of the wall the size
of a tennis ball, and the knobless door.
"'Ere" said Ron," that was a good idea Colonel to put that advert on t.v." he said."Bet you never thought you were going to get a
free makeover."

Suddenly there was a commotion outside. "What's happening?" asked Dora. "Oh no" shouted Steve,opening the door, "That
idiot's undone the wrong gate, he's let Alex out. He's galloping like mad round the yard."
"Do you mean Alex or Frank" said Slugger.
"Both" said Ron. "Look."
Frank was chasing after Alex. "We've got to do something Steve" yelled Dora, "Or someone's going to get hurt."
"Worry yourselves not" cried out Frank, "I'll catch him." Frank chased after Alex then launched himself into the air and landed on
the horse and held on for dear life. "Frank, are you alright?" shouted Betty."
"Oooh Betty"  screamed Frank riding sidesaddle," how do you stop this thing." He struggled onto the horses back.
"He's sitting on Alex the wrong way round" exclaimed the Colonel. Frank was holding on to his tail, riding bareback.
Steve dashed out. "Easy boy,"he said. "Easy" As soon as Alex saw Steve he stopped. Unfortunately Frank didn't. He was hurled
into the air and with a crash he ended up in the Lightning tree, hanging upside down, one of his shoes wedged in the boughs.
"Frank" shouted Betty, "Are you alright."
"I'm perfectly fine Betty" he replied. "Colonel, did you know you've got a cracked chimney pot on the roof, you ought to get it
repaired otherwise someone's going to have a nasty accident" he said.
"Betty, my foot's slipping out of my shoe, I don't think I'll be hanging around here for much longer."
"Quick" said the Colonel, "Get something to break his fall." There was a wheelbarrow nearby full of fresh steaming horsemuck.
Ron quickly wheeled it underneath Frank ."AAARRGHH" He shouted as his foot slipped out of his shoe. He hurtled downwards
and with a loud plop ended up headfirst in the wheelbarrow. "Help, help" he gurgled'
Ron and Slugger grabbed a leg each."Hey" shouted Steve, "Don't forget to make a wish."

They lifted him out and layed him on the floor. The Colonel dashed out. "Good Lord" he said, "Is anything broken?"
"Nah" said Slugger inspecting the wheelbarrow, "I fink it's alright."
Frank sat up. "Frank, Frank," said Betty.
"Be careful" said the Colonel, "He could be suffering delusions."
"'Ow would we know?" said Ron.
"Frank, are you alright?" asked Betty.
"I'm fine" said Frank taking his beret off and wiping the dirt from his eyes. "Fear not Betty, good job I was wearing this. Nothing
befalls me when I'm wearing my lucky beret" he said. Suddenly his shoe slipped from out of the trees branches, plunged
downwards and hit Frank on the head with a loud "clunk". He slumped backwards onto the floor unconscious, his beret still in
his hand.
"Blimey" said Slugger, "'Ee was right about that then."

To be continued.........

Cut out the strong to help the weak

Offline pete.r.

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Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #2 on: February 11, 2015, 03:19:32 PM »
PART 3

"The next one to arrive" said the Colonel, "Is a Captain Mainwaring." Suddenly an army lorry full of soldiers arrived, brandishing guns.
"Blimey" exclaimed Slugger," I didn't realise we'd declared war on somebody. Mind you, I missed the news this morning."
"Hello" said the Colonel, "I'm Colonel Maddocks."
"I'm Captain Mainwaring" came the reply, "And this is my platoon of Home Guards. Sergeant Wilson, get the men to fall out" he said.
"Would you mind awfully just falling out, in your own time," said Sergeant Wilson, "Whenever you're ready."
"Good grief" said Captain Mainwaring, rolling his eyes.
"Permission to speak sir" said an old soldier. "Yes, what is it Jones?"
"The men have fell out sir." "Blimey," Said Slugger, "They should fit in well 'ere then, everyone's always fallin' out."
"Excuse me Captain" said an even older soldier, "It's been a long drive from Walmington-on-Sea. May I be excused?"
"Good Heavens" replied Mainwaring, someone show Private Godfrey where the toilet is."

"Right" said the Colonel, "Why don't we take tea in the house," They all bustled into the room, rifles jostling against each other.
Dora closed her eyes and put her fingers in her ears, expecting one to go off.
"Do you think I could stand by the fire Uncle Arthur?" said young Private Pike, wearing a scarf around his neck. "I think I've
caught a chill sitting in the back of that lorry." "Of course Frank" replied Sergeant Wilson, "Your mother Mavis wouldn't want
you to catch a cold."
"Good Lord" said Captain Mainwaring looking at Pike, "You stupid boy'"
"'Ere we are" said Slugger, "Tea and sandwiches." Private Godfrey returned from the toilet. "My sister Dolly makes lovely cucumber
sandwiches" he said.
"'Ere, which one is she then" said Ron.
"Oh no, she's not in the Homeguards" replied Private Godfrey. "She lives at home with my other sister."

"Permission to speak sir" said Lance- Corporal Jones.
"Yes Jones, what is it?"
"Why don't we tell Colonel Maddocks why we're here" he answered. "Yes, thank you Jones" he said. "Now, where was I."
"We're doomed" said Private Frazer, in a broad Scottish accent. "We're all doomed."
"Blimey" replied Ron, "'Ee must 'ave just eaten one of your sandwiches Slugs."
"It's mad,quite mad" continued Frazer. "Ye dinna understan' ye auld dunderhead sassanachs. Death will come to ye all. Aye, death.
Och aye the noo."
"What did he say?" asked Steve.
"Permission to speak sir" said Jones. "Yeah, and make it in English" said Slugger.
"Private Godfrey would like to be excused again sir" replied Jones. "What, already" said Captain Mainwaring, "He's only just been."
"It's the tea sir" said Godfrey, "It goes straight through me."
"Good grief" said Captain Mainwaring, "I think instead of coming to look for a horse we should be out looking for a mobile toilet instead."

"So you've come to look for a horse" said the Colonel. "Yes, we want to use it to pull a cart that has all our supplies and ammunition
on"  replied Mainwaring. "We want to be ready next time there's a war on. We want to strike first."
"Let's hope the enemy don't drop an atom bomb then" said Ron.
"Do you think that's wise sir," said Sergeant Wilson, "Carrying ammunition around like that."
"Well, it'll be mainly bayonets" replied the Captain. "Yes" said Lance-Corporal Jones,"They don't like it up 'em."
"Mr Mannering" said Pike, "What do we do if they do drop an atom bomb on us?"
"You stupid boy Pike," said Mainwaring. "'Ere" said Private Joe Walker, a black market spiv, "I've got a job lot of gas masks,
anyone want to buy one?" "I'll take one" said Private Godfrey, "And I'll take one for my sister Dolly, too."
"For goodness sake" said Captain Mainwaring, "If they do drop an atom bomb on us, there's only one thing we can do."
"Don't panic Mr Mannering!" shouted Jones. "Don't panic!"

"Now look here" said Colonel Maddocks, "You and your men have a look round and let me know if you find a suitable horse."
They looked around. "Hey Mr Mannering, this looks a nice horse" said Pike. "Oh how lovely Frank" said Sergeant Wilson.
"That's Copper" exclaimed Steve, "He's Dora's horse, he's not for sale."
"You stupid boy" said Mainwaring.
"Well I wasn't to know" said Pike. "Was I Uncle Arthur." "Of course not Frank" replied Sergeant Wilson.
"When I get home I'm going to tell my mum" said Pike.
"This one looks ideal" said the Captain. "We'll take him."
"Do you think that's wise sir?" exclaimed Sergeant Wilson. "He looks awfully old to me." "That's Charlie" said Steve. "He's too old to
pull a cart."
"Just testing you Wilson" said Mainwaring. "I was wondering who'd be the first to spot that."

Twenty minutes later they returned back to the house. "I'm sorry" said Mainwaring to Colonel Maddocks, "But you don't have any
steeds that can match the pace of my men." Lance-Corporal Jones and Private Godfrey hobbled out of the house, barely able to walk.
"Well 'ees right about that Colonel" said Slugger. "Sorry we couldn'd have been of any assistance" said Dora.
"Right, we'll be off then" said Mainwaring. "Sergeant Wilson, get the men fell in will you."
"Would you mind awfully falling in" said Sergeant Wilson, "In your own time." "ATTEN-SHUN" Shouted Lance- Corporal Jones.
Quick march, left right, left right, left right....." They all marched up the yard, falling over each other and tripping up on their rifles.

"Stryker", said the Colonel.
"Permission to speak sir" replied Ron, standing up straight and saluting. "Remind me never to call you a stupid buffoon ever again"
he said. "Oh thanks awfully sir" said Ron.
"Yes, I think the phrase is "You stupid boy" said the Colonel, walking away.

To be continued.........

Cut out the strong to help the weak

Offline pete.r.

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Re: Only Fools and Horses
« Reply #3 on: February 12, 2015, 06:25:52 PM »
PART 4

"Right" said the Colonel, "The last people to come and look at a horse are -oh, another firm" he said, looking at his bit of paper.
"Trotters Independent Trading Company, New York, Paris and Peckham it says here."
"Wow" said Steve, "They sound a really experienced, successful, international business consortium." "Here they are now" said Slugger.
A grubby three wheeled yellow Reliant Regal van pulled into the yard. Four men got out. Slugger opened the door.
"Ah, glad to see you, I'm Colonel Maddocks."
"Lovely jubbly" replied a well dressed man, "I'm Del Boy." "And I'm Uncle Albert" said an old man with a beard. Ron was drinking a mug
of tea. "'Ere Slugs" he said, "'Ee looks just like that bloke who advertises Birds Eye fish fingers on t.v."
"Yeah" exclaimed Slugger, "Maybe we can get him to star in the Colonel's next blockbuster advert."
"Follyfoot Farm, that's a stupid name" said a third man who was tall and slim. "What idiot called it that? By the way, my name's Trigger."
Ron almost choked on his tea.

"Good Lord" said the Colonel looking out of the window at the van, "What's that horrible thing doing in the yard.?"
"Oh sorry about that" replied Del Boy looking out of the window. "Rodders, Rodders, come in here" he shouted. "You're making the
place look untidy."
"Blimey, don't tell me Roy Rogers is here as well" said Slugger. Rodney came in. "You plonker" said Del.
"'Ere Del, they've got two donkeys here" said Rodney. "That's nothing" replied Del, "I've got three."
"Hey Del Boy" said Uncle Albert, "I thought that's what we came here for." "What, you want our donkeys?" said Dora.
"Well, I had this idea" said Del. "Where we live, in Nelson Mandela House in Peckham, there's nothing much for the kids to do."
"'Cept nick cars and then set fire to 'em" said Rodney. "Yeah, I wondered why we sold loads of petrol cans this year Dave"
said Trigger. "'Ere, during the war" said Uncle Albert...." So I thought if we had a lorry load of sand delivered we could make it like a seaside place and give donkey rides to the kids" continued Del Boy."We can make a fortune."
"So you want to use our donkeys as beach donkeys" said Steve. "'Ere Dave, why didn't we think of that?" said Trigger to Rodney.
"That tree outside" exclaimed Del, "Has anyone ever been hung from it?""Funny you should say that" said Slugger.
"Because someone's about to be" said Del looking at Trigger.
"Do you think this idea will work Del?" said Rodney. "He who dares wins Rodders. "This time next year we'll be millionaires" he replied.

"Where exactly do you live?" asked Dora. "In a council high rise tower block" answered Rodney. "But you can't possibly look after them
and feed them properly" said the Colonel. "Plus the fact our donkeys aren't working donkeys."
"We're not going to send them to work" said Rodney, "They'll be on the beach, it'll be just like a holiday."
"You plonker Rodney" said Del Boy. "No I'm sorry, it's out of the question" replied the Colonel.
"I could always throw in a free blow up doll" said Del, we've still got some left over from our last business deal.
"Lovely Jubbly" said an excited Ron. "'Ere, during the war" said Uncle Albert...."What on earth would I want a blow up doll for" said
a bemused Colonel. "The mind boggles" said Slugger. "Hey, you could always stick it in the barn leaning on a rake" Steve said, "It'd
do the same amount of work as Ron then." "Cushty" said Del Boy.
"Well I'm sorry we couldn't do business with you, we'll see ourselves out" said Del.

The Colonel sat in his chair. "Well, what a waste of time that advert was" he said. "We havn't even sold one horse."
"We're doomed" said Ron, "We're all doomed." "'Ere, during the war" said Slugger.......There was a knock at the door.
"Is that someone at the door Slugger?" asked the Colonel. "Bloomin' 'ope not" he replied, "I've about run out of me nerve tablets."
"Well don't just sit there" said the Colonel, open the door Slugger, you never know, with any luck it could be someone come to buy
one of our horses."
"Yeah" replied Slugger, and you never know, with any luck it could be someone 'oos not stark ravin' bonkers."

"Blimey", said Slugger looking out of the door. "What is it?" said the Colonel. "Come and look" he replied. Outside in the yard people
were milling about everywhere. Steptoe and Son walked by. "We took all that rubbishy lead piping out of your khazi" said Harold,
"It was all old and manky, just like me dad. "We've weighed it in at the scrapyard with some of our stuff" continued Albert, "And
bought you new lead piping and replaced it for you. "Blimey", exclaimed the Colonel.
"Look!" shouted Dora. "On the roof."
There was Frank, in his beret and raincoat, walking along the roof carrying a chimney pot. "He'll kill himself" said the Colonel.
Frank deftly climbed down a ladder. "Whilst we were at the builder's merchants we got you a new chimney pot" he said. "The old
one was dangerous. I've cemented it in." "Crikey" said Steve, looking up at it, "He's done a good job too." "You can always use
the old one to grow flowers in" said Betty. "Incredible" replied the Colonel.
The Home Guards were there too. Their truck was full of bales of hay, they passed it down a line of soldiers into the barn.
"We noticed whilst looking around you were low on hay" said Captain Mainwaring. "We thought we'd help you out."
"Amazing" said the Colonel. "It's the least we could do" said the Captain. "See that old man in the yard next to the three wheeler van."
"You mean Uncle Albert" said Dora. "Yes," said Captain Mainwaring. "During the war he single handedly saved several of my men's
lives" he said, "When he chased an enemy sniper away who was shooting at them. He only had a rifle with a bayonet on it. He's a hero." "They don't like it up 'em" said Del Boy. "Oh, and by the way" said Trigger, "Tomorrow Dave's going to spray the back of the
van with the words "Follyfoot needs your support, please give generously," and your phone number on."
"Good Lord" replied the Colonel. "I don't believe it."
"Blimey, don't tell me Victor Meldrew's coming round next" said Slugger.

"No, that's everyone" exclaimed the Colonel, looking at his bit of paper. "Well, it looks like that Follyfoot commercial was a success" he said." In fact, I'm cushty."
"Mmmm.....nice," said Ron.
"Lovely jubbly" said Slugger.
"How awfully good of everyone" said Steve.

Dora had spent the previous morning in the office with her uncle paying all Follyfoot's bills for the month, she only had a few pence
left in her purse. She walked towards the Lightning tree, put her arms around it, and closed her eyes.

"This time next year" she said, "We'll be millionaires."

                                                                                 THE END



Cut out the strong to help the weak