Tony.
My mate emailed me and asked what I was doing.
"Probably failing my driving test" I replied.
If you get a link called 'Free Kinky Porn you sexy thing' don't open it. It is a virus wich deactivates yoor spelcheque and garbles upp yor riting so if yoo re-cibe it doont open itt.
Q. Who's the patron Saint of email?
A. St. Francis of a CC.
Patient. Doctor, I need your help, I'm addicted to checking my Twitter.
Doctor. I'm sorry, I don't follow.
I just got fired from my job at the keyboard factory. They told me I wasn't putting in enough shifts.
I saw a driver texting and driving on the M1. I was so annoyed I threw my beer at him.
The great thing about naming your kids is you don't have to add 6 numbers to make sure the name is available.
I found out two things today.
1. My computer will always be better than me at chess.
2. I'm better than it at kick boxing.
Reef knot, granny knot, surgeon knot, square knot, I can't do any of them but my head phones sure as hell can.
Before Linkedin I didn't know any strangers.
I got sacked from PC World today. A guy came in and asked me what was the best thing to finding my ancestors. I said a shovel.
In the Internet cafe my computer crashed. All the other computers slowed down to see what was happening.
I've just spent 43 minutes trying to fix a faulty clock on my laptop. At least I think it was 43 minutes.
