Author Topic: Moonlight and Roses  (Read 6651 times)

Offline Jane

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Re: Moonlight and Roses
« Reply #45 on: August 23, 2011, 12:32:09 PM »
Slugger packed his clothes and checked out of the hotel, still thinking about what he could do to get even with Kathy. It needed Bert’s help but he wasn’t sure if he would cooperate.

“I’ll go and talk to him” he decided, looking at his watch. “There should just be time to sort it out before the wedding…if Bert will help.” Once at the café he made sure Kathy was nowhere to be seen before he entered and sought out Bert.

“What you doing ere?” Bert said in surprise as Slugger sidled up to him.

“Kathy ain’t ere is she?” he asked, nervously looking around. It would ruin everything if she turned up now.

“No she’s just gone to the newspaper shop. She won’t be long. What on earth is the matter? Shouldn’t yer be getting inter yer wedding gear?”

“I will be, but I need yer help first Bert. I take it yer didn’t read what Kathy put in the card?” Bert shook his head.

“No I didn’t think yer had.” He repeated what Kathy had written and Bert scowled.

“She’s gone too far this time. Milly didn’t deserve that, nor you neither. What can I do to help?”

Slugger looked out of the window and saw Kathy coming up the road. “She’s coming back!”

“Quick, this way!” Bert shoved Slugger through the kitchen door and listened while he rapidly explained his plan. Bert smiled.

“That should teach her a lesson all right!”

“You up fer it then?” Slugger asked anxiously.

“Of course, now get back ter yer wedding and leave it with me!”

Slugger scuttled off just as Kathy entered the kitchen. “Who were you talking to?” she demanded.

“No one” Bert shrugged.

“First sign of madness, talking to yerself” she sneered and tapped her head.

Bert replied with a smile.

Offline loopylin

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Re: Moonlight and Roses
« Reply #46 on: August 23, 2011, 10:44:07 PM »
Slugger emerged from the taxi at Follyfoot looking rather bedraggled. 'Where on earth have you been?' asked Hazel. Steve and Ron are out looking for you.'
'I've been on han himportant mission- right now I'm dying for a cuppa. Be a good gel and put the kettle on. The phone rang and Hazel picked it up. 'Ron! - he's back. He looks like he's been dragged through a hedge backwards. You'd better get back here quick.' Ron ran from the telephone box to the tiger , he and Steve had met up a few minutes ago to compare notes. 'It's okay he's turned up.' he said waving his arms. 'Come on mate, we got a wedding to go to.'
'What are you all dressed up for?' Kathy asked Bert an hour after Slugger's departure.
'I thought we'd go out for a meal, give you a chance to wear your wedding outfit. Go get yourself changed.'
'Where are we going?'
'It's a surprise!'
'See, I told you Slugger wouldn't let me down' said Milly as Dora helped her into her outfit.
'Ee I'm as nervous as a kitten, I hope I don't get my vows wrong. Do I look alright?'
Dora fastened the string of pearls round Milly's neck. ' You look fantastic- come and show Steve.'
'My word, you two are a sight for sore eyes' he said as they went into the lounge.' How about a glass of something to steady your nerves Milly?'
'I wouldn't say no to a nice sweet sherry.'
Steve poured one out for her and a dry white wine for Dora. As he was driving the bride Steve had orange juice. Jeff had been sitting in his baby bouncer looking at what was going on and obviously felt it was time someone paid him some attention as he began to grizzle. As Dora got up from her seat on the settee next to Milly the sudden movement made Milly start and some of the sherry spilled onto her outfit. ' Oh no! Will it stain?' asked
Dora. 'I'll deal with Jeff, you sponge it off.' said Steve. As he picked Jeff up it was obvious the baby had a very unpleasant nappy. ' Oh heck, I'll have to be careful.' said Steve not wanting any more mishaps. The original plan was that Slugger and Ron were going to drive to the church in a horse drawn  carriage and then Slugger would drive his bride back to the bungalow but the bad weather had put paid to that so a taxi had been ordered to take them instead. Hazel was going with them and Dora and Jeff were going with Steve and Milly. Hazel had spent most of the previous day at the bungalow cooking and had laid everything for the buffet ready in the kitchen before going back to Follyfoot to change.When Dora went to the kitchen in search of a clean sponge she gasped in horror. The wedding cake which Hazel had taken such care to assemble had collapsed and was now a rather unappetising pile of choux buns, chocolate sauce and cream. It was too late to let Hazel know as the ceremony was in half an hour. She shut the door on the mess and went to the bathroom to deal with Milly's outfit. In less than 20 minutes they were on their way. Slugger, Ron and Hazel had arrived at the church and Kathy was asking Bert what he was up to as he approached the village where the wedding was to take place. 'Slugger wants us to be there- so we're going to the wedding.' he announced.
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Offline Jane

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Re: Moonlight and Roses
« Reply #47 on: August 24, 2011, 12:16:25 PM »
“I can’t believe that buffoon wants us there any more than Milly does. Turn the car around, I’m not going to that farce of a wedding!” she shouted. But Bert ignored her and drove into a parking area beside the Church.

He switched off the engine and turned to face Kathy. “We ARE attending this wedding whether you like it or not. You wanted to show off yer new outfit so now’s yer chance.”

Kathy stayed put as Bert got out of the car. “Get out!” he hissed “or I’ll drag yer out in front of everyone” he pointed to the small crowd of curious wedding guests “yer don’t want ter make a spectacle of yerself do yer?”

Kathy slowly got out of the car, her nose in the air as she walked past the other wedding guests. Someone tittered as she walked past and a small boy said loudly “’ere mum, look at the back of that woman’s dress!” and collapsed in a fit of giggles.

“Shhh!” his mother replied “She’ll hear you!”

Kathy spun round and stared at the woman “What are you laughing at?” But Bert dragged her forward into the church. “What’s the matter with them?” She asked Bert as they seated themselves near the front of the church.

“Take no notice luv, they were just admiring your new dress” he answered, trying not to laugh himself.

Offline loopylin

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Re: Moonlight and Roses
« Reply #48 on: August 24, 2011, 11:21:49 PM »
Slugger was fidgeting in his seat when Ron suddenly said 'Aye Aye- look who just came in-I thought she was banned! Slugger turned and Bert gave him a thumbs up. Dora walked into the church carrying Jeff and her mouth dropped open as she spotted Kathy. She was going to tell her to get the heck out of there but Slugger said aloud 'Leave it girl'. Steve was relieved that the rain had stopped and the buckets had been removed. The organ was playing too and he and Milly processed slowly down the aisle to the strains of 'Moonlight and Roses'. She didn't notice Kathy as she had eyes only for her groom who stood waiting, a broad smile on his face. Steve did notice Kathy and glowered at her, she pulled a face behind his back.
Steve, Dora, Slugger and Ron held their breath when the congregation were asked if anyone knew of any reason why Slugger and Milly should not be married. Kathy did open her mouth but Bert whispered 'don't you dare!' Sluggers sister and Dora held hankies to their faces as the ceremony progressed. When the bridal party went to sign the register Kathy hissed 'Can we go now, I'm dying for a fag!'
'Not until the happy couple have gone outside for the photos- and then I insist you give them your best wishes.'
'I've already given them my wishes!' Kathy barged past Bert just as the organ struck up. Slugger laughed out loud and pointed at Kathy's back with his good hand 'Will yer look at that Mil?' Milly tried not to giggle but it was hard. Most people in the church now followed Sluggers example laughing aloud and pointing. Kathy's outfit was pale blue and the back was now emblazoned with a picture of a pig drawn in black felt tip pen and the words 'I am a nasty selfish pig' were underneath.' Kathy remembered that Bert had insisted that her outfit needed a good brush to bring it up to it's best. He had taken a long time over it. She went to the vicar and asked him what was funny about her dress and reluctantly he told her. Outside the church were some of Slugger's riding class making a guard of honour with riding crops. This done several of them picked up buckets and as Kathy, almost exploding with rage, went past they threw the contents, horse manure all over her. As it slid off her onto the ground her feet slipped and she sat down in it. ' Don't just stand there you great ninny, help me up!' she yelled at Bert.
'What- me in me best suit- I should cocoa.'
Milly was no longer laughing. 'Oh Slugger- that's my little sister. How unkind we've been!'
'Tit for tat I reckon gel- we're just about even.The vicar's wife who'd been cleaning up the church earlier now approached Kathy carrying an old blanket. 'You had best come with me my dear, you can have a shower and I'll lend you some clothes. I'm afraid you'll miss the photos. ' You're welcome to come to the bungalow later Kath' said Milly prepared now to offer an olive branch.'I'll wait here for you.' said Bert who was now also feeling a bit sorry for Kathy. 'Come on folks, show's over- let's get these photos done then we can go have some grub.' Slugger said. Hazel detached herself from the group and asked one of the local lads to give her a lift back to see what she could do about the wedding cake. As they stood in front of the camera for a group photo Steve said to Slugger ' I suppose that's where you were this morning- setting all this up. Then including Bert in the conversation he said 'You're a couple of old rogues!'
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Offline Jane

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Re: Moonlight and Roses
« Reply #49 on: August 25, 2011, 10:51:39 AM »
Kathy was wearing an old brown frock that the vicar’s wife had leant her. It looked awful and hung like a sack on her. Bert looked  her up and down and smiled. “Never mind luv” he said “I’ll buy yer another outfit.” She ignored him and climbed unhappily into the waiting taxi.

As they pulled up outside the bungalow Kathy wailed “I don’t want to go in there looking like this!” Bert pushed her none to gently out of the taxi. As she stood uncertainly by the front door she caught sight of Slugger staring at her through the living room window. She glared at him but Slugger just winked at her, pointed to her dress and stuck up his thumb. Suddenly Kathy saw the funny side and grinned. “You know something Bert, Sluggers gone up in my estimation. I couldn’t have planned a better tit for tat if I’d tried! And as for you, you old rogue!” She thumped him playfully on the arm.

 “We just wanted yer to understand how mean yer were being. I think you realise that now don’t yer?”

Kathy looked down at the sensible brown court shoes, also provided by the vicar’s wife, and nodded.

“Come on then, let’s get inside and toast the happy couple!”

Offline loopylin

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Re: Moonlight and Roses
« Reply #50 on: August 25, 2011, 10:55:46 PM »
Steve was dispensing drinks and at first didn't notice his mother arrive. 'Haven't you got a kiss for your mum?' she asked going over to pick up a glass of sherry. Dutifully he gave her a peck on the cheek. 'Why don't you go over and say hello to your grandson, he's nearly six months old and you've not seen him properly yet.' Kathy hesitated, she didn't really like babies. She was saved by Hazel announcing that the food was ready. 'Later eh- I'm starving!'
Slugger and Milly sat side by side on the settee. 'Let me get you both some grub' said Ron. Everyone did justice to the food and the drink flowed freely. Milly got slightly tipsy and giggled a lot, By the time it came to cutting the cake and the speeches Kathy was very clearly drunk. She looked at the cake which Hazel had hastily reassembled as best she could. 'I don't think I want any of that. Get me another glass of wine for the toast Steve.' 'I'm only giving you a little and topping it up with orange juice.' Kathy was about to protest when she saw the vicar's wife who had just arrived with her husband bearing down on her.
'How are you now my dear? Got over your ordeal? We couldn't get here before because my husband had a funeral.I put your dress in the washing machine. It's dry now if you want to
change. '
'Oh thanks- I'll let you have your dress back after I've washed it- and the shoes. I'll send them to Steve.' 'Oh there's no need to worry dear- everything came out of the things left from the last jumble sale. ' Bert and Slugger looked at each other and tried not to laugh.'
'Friends, if I could just have your attention for a few minutes I'd like to propose a toast to Milly and Slugger. There have been times over the past few weeks when we thought this day would not happen. Mishap followed mishap but they have come through smiling. The honeymoon has had to be postponed because they are both plastered. 'Ron let out a guffaw.
'I know they are going to be really happy now and I'm sure that you're all as pleased as Dora and I that Slugger is now officially part of the family- raise your glasses please and drink to Mr and Mrs Slugger Jones.' After the toast Slugger got to his feet. ' ' It's been hard for me since I lost Tiny and our son but thanks to the colonel I came through and got another family when Ron, Dora and Steve came along. When the colonel died it was another blow but seeing Dora and Steve married and then having little Jeff made me happy again- I didn't think I'd ever meet another girl like my Tiny and I didn't cos my Milly is completely different and so very special. Thank you all for coming, I want to propose another toast- To colonel Geoffrey Maddocks, Gawd rest his dear soul.' There was a spontaneous round of applause after the speeches interrupted by a large snore from Kathy.
'I think you'd better stay here tonight Bert, we'll remake the bed in Milly's room for Kathy and you can have the small bedroom.' said Steve.
Bert went over to Slugger-'Do us a favour mate and get rid of the nasty card Kathy wrote.'
'Will do- we're keeping the chamber pot  though, Milly's going to put some geraniums in it.'
Bert nudged Kathy 'Come on luv, let's get some fresh air.'
Outside he said 'You know I'm very fond of you don't yer Kath- I only went along with Slugger's plan because I thought you and Milly might be able to patch things up once and for all. I thought she might feel sorry for you and she did. You must admit she's very happy and I reckon you just might be a tiny bit jealous. You've always been the one to attract the fellas, had a good time after you got over yer husbands death and Milly was left to look after yer mum. Now you're feeling lonely and left out- well there's no need. Today's started me off thinking...'
Inside the music centre was playing romantic songs and couples were dancing. Milly and Slugger held their good hands and went slowly round the space that had been cleared for dancing. Ron was waltzing round with Jeff in his arms and Dora and Steve were dancing close together. ' I hope you're as happy as I am Mrs. Jones.' said Slugger
'Ee I am that Mr. Jones.'
'Shall we take a walk in the moonlight?'
'Let's'
Just then the door opened and Kathy and Bert came in smiling. Kathy went and whispered in Milly's ear but it was loud enough for Slugger to hear.
'Steve' he said 'Refill the glasses- we need to have another toast.'
Ron walked over and placed Jeff in Kathy's arms as Bert made his announcement.
'Good health to you two- and may all your troubles be little ones.' said Ron.
The  End
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